Hello etymology my old friend...

Science is not immune to the ever shifting nature of language says Russ Swan. That being the case, time to have some fun with some laboratory staples…

A snowflake is bound to melt in the heat of gaslight. Until recently, that would have been a simple and logical, if fairly pointless, observation on phase transition in winter precipitation. Today, it is layered with hidden meaning due to the ever-changing definitions of words. A snowflake is not just a unit of frozen rain, but is also a derogatory term for young adults who, according to certain sections of society, lack emotional robustness and take offence too easily. They had it tough in the old days, those old fogeys, and they’ll never stop telling you about it.

But that telling may, in fact, be nothing but gaslighting. This term, borrowed from a 1944 Ingrid Bergman film, refers to the systematic rewriting of truth through persistent denial, misdirection, contradiction, and plain old lying. You might have noticed a bit of this going on recently, and it is surely no coincidence that in British slang a trump is a release of flatulence, or gas. Language is an evolving thing, and a steady supply of new definitions for old words means that it can be hard to keep up. This is as true in science as it is in politics, and with that in mind we have collected a few helpful neologisms for your edification:

Aerobic [e??r??b?k] all set for the conference, with a chocolate bar and a spare pen Anode [?æn??d] a sort of poem Antigen [?ænt???n] Uncle Pete’s wife Assay [??se?] one-third of an introduction to a science joke: “Assay, assay, assay…” Bohr model [Bohr ?m?dl] scale replica of a male pig Boyle’s law [b??lz l??] that rule about watching kettles Bumping [?b?mp??] playing the triangle with your posterior Catalyst [?kæt?l?st] inventory of felines Cell [s?l] plate dealing in crockery Colloids [?k?l??dz] on the phone to the bank Cuvette [kju??v?t] pigeon doctor Dielectric [?da???l?ktr?k] the last chair the prisoner sat in Density [?d?ns?ti] large town for dragons Dipole [?da??p??l] stick used when applying stain DNA [di?-?n-e?] Glaswegian asking a question Ecology [??k?l??i] scientific study of screams Electron [??l?ktr?n] bring back President Reagan Endosperm [??nd??sp??m] vasectomy Farad [?fær?d] marketing message in the distance Genome [??i?n??m] wow, a garden ornament Halogen [?hæl???n] what Uncle Pete says when he comes home Hertz [h??ts] where’s the aspirin? Impedance [?m?pi?d?ns] when a sprite pulls some shapes Joule [?u?l] pistols at dawn Lysis [?la?s?s] when a sibling gaslights Microtome [?ma?kr?t??m] a very small very large book Nanotechnology [?næn??t?k?n?l??i] when Granny won’t go online Neuron [?nj??r?n] reanimated President Reagan Ohm [??m] where the art is Parameter [p??ræm?t?] measuring device that jumps out of aircraft Pathogen [?pæ?????n] route taken by Uncle Pete’s wife Pathology [p????l??i] scientific study of rights of way Pathological [?pæ???l???k?l] the only sensible way forward Peer review [p?? r??vju?] study of seaside structures Pollination [?p?l??ne???n] a country with lots of parrots Serum [?s??r?m] what a pirate hopes to do when he enters a bar Sublime [s??bla?m] preventing scurvy in submariners T cell [ti? s?l] a bit like a coffee cup Titer [?t?t?] your lab coat after a big lunch Triple point [?tr?pl p??nt] a fork

Russ Swan

So come on then - your turn! We want your best re-definition of a scientific term. Efforts on an email to phil.prime@laboratorynews.co.uk - the best will appear in the March issue and bag themselves a prize in the form of a clutch of cool science books.